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Home5 Married People Speaks About The Concept Of A Submissive Wife

5 Married People Speaks About The Concept Of A Submissive Wife

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Five married people was asked if submission plays any role in their marriage.

What is submission? This depends on who is asking and what they mean.

The dictionary defines submission, “as the action of accepting or yielding to a superior force or the will or authority of another person.” It is also defined as the condition of “being humble or obedient.”

According to the bible, “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.”Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything

Ephesians 5:22-24

Here is the literal take on submission: The man is the one who is supposed to lead the home and woman is to obey. And older generations tried to subscribe to it.

Even the former MD of First Bank, Ibukun Awosika denied that she kneels to greet her husband. But she admits have knelt to honour him and thank him on her birthday.

Jumoke Adenowo, Author, Minister and Architect says this about a woman submitting, “Submission is that you have all the capacity and resources to do something, but your husband is against it and you obey.”

Submission meant our mothers knelt to greet, serve food, do all the chores and always agree to what our fathers said.

If your husband wanted you to quit your job, you did that. If he didn’t like what you wore, you changed it. In extreme cases, you even condoned his cheating.

Femi says that submission does not exist in his marriage, “No one has time to think of the other person submitting. I do not roll over and ask myself, did my wife say ‘sir’ when she was greeting me this morning? It is all about kindness and being a kind person. When my wife cooks she serves me, and when I cook, I serve her.

It is just how I would treat someone I care about. No one is trying to be the ‘head’, if we have issues that require decision making, we compromise and I don’t say listen to me because I am the head.”

Dayo says, “We are both educated. My wife is the Human Resource Manager for a multinational company. She has so much money and I do not reckon you can control someone like that. She acts just like a wife would, I guess. I would say that submission comes into play when a man has a lot of money, but I do not think submission has any role in modern marriages.”

“Our mothers sacrificed their lives for us and our dreams. They denied themselves to make us happy – whether the child was male or female, they let go of their dreams because of their children. It isn’t necessary now.”

Stephen says, “I think submission exists because for me submission means loyalty and my wife is loyal to me. If she gets a raise, she tells me about it and I don’t ask for her money. The openness is submission, not me telling her to stand up and clean the house. I even still give her a monthly stipend despite the fact that she earns her own money.”

Fisayo says; “I don’t buy into the idea of submission, a marriage is an equal partnership, they should be agreement and consensus.”

Even though gender roles still exist in terms of taking care of the family and child-rearing, women have jettisoned the concept of submission.

Esther, what she thinks about submission, and she says, “In this day and age, what we have is a better and an upgraded meaning of submission. Blame it on the economy, blame it on the country but old fashioned submission doesn’t work these days and people are still happily married.

“For me, I am submissive, although it can’t be 100% because sometimes we have to disagree to agree. So, my submission level is 99%.”

Final thoughts

The truth is that more and more modern marriages seem more like a partnership with few people sticking to traditional arrangements. Why?

  1. Economically, men are not sole bread winners anymore.
  2. Women are educated.
  3. People want partners and not lords and masters.
  4. Marriage should be about mutual love and respect. Perhaps that is the point of love and submission: that both parties should be willing to compromise for the good of the marriage.

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